Kiss o’ Death

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Here’s the thing…I’m standing at the curb waiting to cross to my car.  It’s evening and I’m somewhat dapper in my simple straw fedora. As I’m waiting, a car moves towards me and then slows.  I then notice, nonchalantly, of course, that there is hotness behind the wheel.  We’re not talking 30/30 (only looks good from 30 feet away or driving by at 30mph) hotness here either. I did detect some youth, so I did a quick take for the fuzz, just in case it was a set up…Anyway, car slows and said hotness leans out the window and says, “love your hat”, so far, so good…But then she adds the kiss o’ death, “it’s so cute”.  You got to be shittin’ me.

You’re killin’ me Smalls!  Now I’m a cute old man!  When did this happen?  Life is truly a bitch.  Of course I thanked the young lady and slowly shuffled on to my car.  Fuck, I wish I had a walker.

It’s like Ian Fleming said: “Sex is free until after 40, then you have to tell a story for it.  It’s the story that hurts the most”.

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